Friends are an important part of life. True friendships take time establish. In order to have a true friend, you need to allow a certain vulnerability, level of honesty, trust and respect.
A lot of people aren’t totally honest with themselves, so it makes it difficult to trust someone else on that level.
It took me years to find a person that I wanted to share my innermost secrets with. It was when I was going through a tough situation in my life and connected with someone that was also going through some stuff in her life. Since opening up my life to her and finding a true friend in her, I have been able to open myself up to others.
Now I have a circle of 3 people that I consider to be my true friends that hold a very valuable spot in my life – they are my support, my team, my unit, they have my back and I have theirs. Each one is different and unique and adds something very different to my life. Different advice, different perspectives and different support. I am very blessed for each friendship and I truly treasure each one individually.
For years, I took everyone at face value and believed everyone had good intentions and it led me to a place of getting hurt a lot. Not everyone views friendship the same, not everyone wants to be a true friend – unfortunately people enjoy finding things out about you and then sharing that information with others when it was meant to be a private conversation. (and a lot of them put a different spin on the facts and change the conversation in different ways)
Choose your friends wisely, find out what their definition of friendship is and what friendship means to them. Have some conversations before you jump in with both feet.
In a true friendship, there is give and take – it is not always 50 – 50 but there should be give and take on both sides. When you have an unbalanced friendship, that should be your first clue that it may not be the healthiest of relationships. It should be beneficial to both parties not just one.
If your life is full of unbalanced relationships, then there isn’t any room for healthy ones to be established. Remember you attract what you put out there – what are you putting out there?
The below link is a good article for food for thought.
https://people.howstuffworks.com/what-is-friendship.htm
Questions to Ponder:
Have you had a true friend?
Are you totally honest with your friend?
Do you consider your spouse your best friend?
Have you been hurt by someone you consider to be a good friend? Has that made you more cautious?